Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
