you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
