girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
