Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
