remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
