i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize