dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
