But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
