My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
