You made me cry and you don't even care
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
