So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
