There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I won't apologize to a one balled man
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize