You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Buhtt sex?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
