um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
