I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
