No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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