OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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