i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I currently don't understand fingers.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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