It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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