Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Come share oat with me in your robe
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
