what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
