hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
