YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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