I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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