Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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