please come you make the beer taste better
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
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