How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
