I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
