i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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