I feel like abortions should bother me more
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
