Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
