Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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