I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
