Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize