new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
