I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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