Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Can you repeat that, but with context?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
