community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
