My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
