i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
