i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize