used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
