i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
The uberlube is also flammable
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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