Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize