Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
You were trust falling into bushes
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
