so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
