Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
