OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
