I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
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