Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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