mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
