Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I want to fling myself into the sun
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
