I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize